Medical Updates… Surgery Looms…

Hi all, yes, once again, it’s been awhile. A little over a month… ugh! I can make no excuses other than that I have felt like absolute rubbish.

I’ve had gut problems… ongoing… so I underwent a combination endoscopy/colonoscopy on Tuesday of this week. It was about as much fun as you can imagine. The doctor who performed the procedures said that he didn’t immediately see anything untoward. He did remove two 4 mm polyps from the colon, and took a biopsy of the upper GI to check for H. Pylori (for ulcer)… but he said things looked mostly good. I do have a hiatal hernia, but I’ve had that since childhood – so that’s nothing new. So… still no answers as to why I am having all of these gut issues. I have a follow-up with them on 04 September and they will have all the results at that time (they sent the biopsy and polyps off to pathology).

The HUGE news is that I will be undergoing major surgery on 20 September to try and repair the CSF leak in my head that has been ongoing for the past several years. They kept taking a wait-and-see approach to see if it would close itself back up, but it didn’t. Apparently, I have dura matter pushing through the hole into my ear canal or something like that? I am probably not explaining that correctly. That’s why doctors make the big money, and not me. Anyway, so they have to cut into my skull. I am having a craniotomy. More precisely, it’s called a “Middle Fossa Craniotomy and Skull Base Defect Repair.” I have to go down to the Atlanta area for it – no one up here in my more rural area does these types of surgeries… so it’s either Atlanta or Nashville. My ENT here is good friends with the surgeon in Atlanta and said that is who he would send his own family members to if they ever needed this operation… so I went with it. I’m told the surgery itself will be a couple of hours, and then I will be in the ICU overnight. Then, if all goes well, they will actually send me home the following day. That, in and of itself, is scary to me. I live alone and they are sending me home the day after cutting into my skull? Yikes? Ah well, I guess it is what it is. I did tell them that I had no family or anyone to come and stay with me. And that hospital is nearly two hours away. *sigh* I guess it is what it is, right? I just have to hope that all will be well.

I am REALLY hoping that this surgery will help to resolve many things I have been enduring. Dizziness. Nausea. Facial flushing. Weakness. Brain fog. Migraines. Balance problems. Neck stiffness. The list goes on… The main thing, though, is that if I do NOT have this operation, I am at a high risk for getting meningitis. I don’t want that. Nope.

With all that I have had going on, I have been trying as much as possible to make it to physical therapy, as well as my chiropractic appointments, because I KNOW those things help me tremendously – not just physically, but mentally as well. They also give me the opportunity to escape this house for just a small sliver of time and to interact with other human beings. That’s something I don’t get to do being stuck at home and in my wheelchair with no way to get anywhere.

I have been remiss with working on my side hustles like the Amazon notebooks, the tee shirt designs, the YouTube channel, etc… mostly because I have felt so awful. I’ve either been suffering with pain or really bad nausea/weakness/dizziness for months now. It’s awful. As a result, I’ve had no money coming in from those things. I made a little over $1.00 on notebook sales last month. None on tee shirts. And my YouTube subscription rate needs to be much higher for me to monetise that at all. I DO hope to get there… but I need to get to feeling better so I can focus on it more fully. My mortgage payment will be increasing soon as the tax rates here and the home values have increased. I’ve also lost an exemption I had previously since Dad is no longer alive (I am not old enough to claim that exemption – you have to be 62). I am just waiting for the shoe to drop… not sure when that increase will kick in, but I have been sent letters about it, so I know it is looming. I am barely making the payment as it is. 🙁 I can’t sell this place and move because where I am now is cheaper than anywhere else out there. It’s a seller’s market right now – not a buyer’s.

Needless to say – I am under extreme financial stress.

I wish I had a magic wand. Or a sure-fire cure. Or a map to a rainbow with the proverbial pot of gold at the end. I don’t. The reality is, I am in a horrible predicament. I’m stuck. I need to find a way to bring in a little income each month, but I’ve been far too ill to focus on anything fully enough to make a go of it. I AM going to keep trying, but… I am beyond frustrated.

It’s not good going into such a major surgery with the weight of the world on my shoulders, financially speaking. It just isn’t. It isn’t good for my health – mental or physical. But this is my lot in life… for the moment… so I just have to try and keep taking things day by day… hour by hour… and hoping for the best. Hoping for a miracle.

I am quite scared about this upcoming surgery. If I were younger, and in better physical shape, maybe I wouldn’t worry so much… but I have multiple autoimmune diseases, am overweight (due to those autoimmune diseases), and severely out of shape (also due to those autoimmune diseases and my inability to exercise). I have sleep apnea, and a blood clotting issue (tied to autoimmune diseases)… it isn’t ideal. The way I see it, though, is that I don’t have a choice. I have to undergo this surgery.

And yes, the stress from the upcoming surgery as well as the financial stress have got my mental health demons working overtime.

Right now, I just ask you all for your good thoughts, prayers, positive energy, and anything in that realm that you have to offer up for me.

And if anyone wants to help me out with any wishlist items or $ donations – that’s always super appreciated!

I do have a bit of great news to close out on… my insurance (Humana managed Medicare) participates in a special program with a 3rd party company that provides hearing aids for people like me – so I now have new hearing aids and they were fully covered!! I am still getting used to them, and they sort of hurt my ears, so I feel like some adjustments will need to be made – it’s still early days… but they are helping me out a LOT! This CSF leak has caused me to lose a lot of my hearing – it’s caused damage there that can’t be fixed… but these hearing aids help to compensate tremendously! So… there IS some good news, right? I have to hold on to those good bits for dear life during times like this. And I am SOOOOO grateful.

Thanks, everyone… until next time… sending soooo much love to all. ❤️